Raising awareness

Hollywood.

It's where the celebrities live. Or at least hang out.

And if there is one thing celebrities love to do, it is raise awareness. Over the years, celebrities have toiled to make sure that our country is aware of things like AIDS, tsunamis, genocide, and many other atrocities that we might never have realized were bad, if we hadn't had someone famous there to let us know.

Once celebrities raise awareness, it's up to the rest of us to care, and hope that somebody else will take action.

But right here in Hollywood, the celebrities' backyard, is a problem that nobody famous seems to be aware of: Hollywood is in the throes of an abandoned furniture epidemic. They are doing their best to hide it, to keep the tourists attractions sparkly and cheap-looking, but it is impossible to walk even a block away from any major street without seeing it. An abandoned couch here, an unwanted desk there--are they the victims, or the threat? It is impossible to say, but they are waiting. Waiting for what, we can only guess.

We are not celebrities. We aren't going to get three dozen of our friends to record a mediocre song that everyone will have to pretend to care about. We don't have the money to produce a big movie that nobody will really see because it's sad, but that would win awards for being so brave. We actually kind of wish we didn't live in Hollywood.

But we do. So we've decided to raise awareness.